Truth Behold
by jnd25
Summary: Angel realizes the hard way on how much Connor really needs his daddy.   Warning: Will contain spanking of a teenager in some chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary**: Angel realizes the hard way on how much his son really needs him.

**Author's Note:**_ AU story- Angel never got sent to a watery grave and Connor just ran off on his own after Holtz died and he found out for himself that Holtz had himself killed. I never really liked how Angel kicked out his troubled son before...Also Cordelia never went to the higher plane either..._

**Warning-** There will be spanking of a teenager in some chapters...Don't like...Don't read... Thanks!

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><p><strong><em>Chapter One<em>**

It was a hot summer afternoon in Los Angeles as Connor Angel sat on a pier on the beach with his legs dangling off the edge; he soaked up the rays as he gazed out onto the ocean in deep thought. It had been almost a week now since Holtz killed himself and the memory was still fresh in his head. That day he planned on visiting Holtz as a surprise and he ended up being the one surprised outside the raggedy motel, he heard clearly how Holtz convinced Justine to stab him on his neck just for it to look like it was a vampire, well one vampire in particular, Angel. Connor just couldn't get how the man that had raised him was not the man he thought he was, sure he didn't always treat Connor as nice as Angel had treated him from the get go. Holtz kept Connor alive and taught him how to survive and he was grateful for that. Now Connor felt alone and it was his choice to be alone, Angel had repeatedly invited him to stay at the Hyperion but Connor refused, he still had a raw hate for all demons and that included his very own father. Angel really confused the hell out of Connor; he was not at all what he thought he would be so it made the all the hate he once felt so strongly not feel as strong anymore.

Connor's stomach rumbled repeatedly in hunger as he sat at the pier, he decided to go in search of food, he eyed a little boy carrying a hot dog and biting down into eat.

"Daddy it tastes funny, I don't want it." The little boy told his father who was walking by his side holding his free hand.

"I thought you said you were starving, give me it." The father took the hot dog and wrapped it in a napkin before trashing it.

Connor saw the man throw out the hot dog and wondered why people in this world would discard food so easily.

Connor crept to pick up the discarded food, as he went to dig his hand in a high pitched voice stopped him.

"Eww that's just nasty!"

Connor looked up and was face to face with a girl that looked to be around his age, she has long red hair, pale skin and bright green eyes, he found himself becoming more attracted to her the more he stared, she wore a shiny blue string bikini top that left nothing to the imagination and a really short white terry cloth skirt.

The girl smiled at Connor's stupefied expression. "Hi I'm Amber...And you are?"

Connor straightened himself upright. "Connor."

"I don't usually do this Connor but I'm going to buy you lunch, you look like you really need it come with me."

Amber took a hold of Connor's arm and practically dragged him off to a hot dog stand that was close by. She ordered a couple of hot dogs and then they sat on a bench and ate. Connor was starving, he was grateful that this girl was being so nice to him.

"Thank you." Connor shying acknowledged.

"No prob, I know how hard it is to live out on the streets...I was living on the streets a few months ago until I met Marty...How long have you been living out on the streets?"

"Not long...I'm kind of new here."

"Well Connor how would you like to make easy money?"

"How?" Connor asked interested.

"Well... I'll just show you, wait here...Watch and learn."

Amber rose up from the bench and walked down the sidewalk and bumped into a couple of tourists then returned to where Connor was seated.

Amber lifted her skirt a bit and showed Connor a tight garter she wore around her thigh that was filled with money.

"I just scored a few bucks back there...but at night that's when you can make the big bucks."

"You stole?"

"I simply got what I needed...You either get it yourself or stay hungry so I chose to go get it and Marty taught me most of what I know. I'm still not as good as him but I'm getting there, if you're up to it I'll introduce you to Marty and maybe he could help you too."

Connor felt so conflicted, he had felt so alone just moments before and now this beautiful girl wanted to help him, he decided to take her up on her offer.

Amber took Connor to meet Marty in an old abandoned warehouse, it was their current residence.

Amber led Connor to the second floor of the warehouse and they found Marty counting small green pills.

"You actually got the X!" Amber exclaimed.

"Yeah we are gonna make some good money with these, but first I want to try them out tonight...who's your little friend?"

"Oh Marty this is Connor...I found him digging through garbage earlier...He's homeless and I was thinking maybe we could help him get on his feet."

"Sure, he could be a big help for us..." Marty then glanced at Connor. "Have you ever tried X before?"

"No...What is that?"

"It's the best shit you will ever try."

"Yes Connor! You gotta try it."

Amber and Marty spent the rest of the day till night teaching Connor the best way to pick someone's pocket and where and how to sell ecstasy pills, they planned on going to a rave that night and were planning on trying out the pills then.

There was not a day that went by that Angel did not think or worry about Connor. It killed him that his son was out living on the streets but he didn't want to force him to come live with him, he wanted his son to grow to trust him enough to come on his own. He tried to reach out to his kid every chance he got but Connor wanted nothing to do with him at the moment and that had hit Angel very deep. All Angel was able to do was keep a watchful eye every night on his son, he found Connor staying in a rundown abandoned motel, he wanted nothing more than to drag his son out of there but he thought stubbornly that was no way to build a relationship with his son.

Angel sat in his office at his desk reviewing a file on a current case they were working on but the thoughts of his son did not escape his mind.

"Vision!" Cordelia screeched.

Angel rushed out of his office and was by Cordelia's side in no time and Gunn and Fred and even Lorne gathered close.

"A party...Lots of kids...loud music...Big hairy demon killing...It's in an underground club called... Ortex by... sunset drive." Cordelia recovered from the vision then looked directly at Angel with a horrified expression. "I saw Connor there! And he didn't look too good...Angel you better hurry."

Angel and Gunn went to the weapons cabinet and geared up then were out the door on their way to the rave ready to kick some demon ass.

Angel anxiety level increased profusely with the knowledge that his son would be in danger.

Connor felt good better than good as he walked down the street with Amber looking absolutely gorgeous in a tight black dress and Marty was nice enough to loan him a red button down dress shirt.

The trio arrived at an underground club, where the rave was going to take place. Marty had his supply ready in his front leather brown jacket.

Marty led Connor and Amber to the bar area in the club and ordered each of them a drink.

Marty then handed both Amber and Connor a small green pill.

"Let the party begin!" Marty laughed as he popped his pill into his mouth then soon after Amber did the same.

Connor watched how carelessly Marty and Amber gulped their pills down, it kind of made him feel less nervous about taking it, he then too popped it into his mouth and washed it down with the drink Marty had gotten for him, he was surprised how the drink burned going down his throat.

"Connor you are going to have the time of your life tonight! I promise you!" Amber laughed as she led him to a plush purple couch. The club was colorfully decorated and had strobe lights flashing everywhere.

Connor enjoyed himself as he felt the drug kicking in; he relaxed against the plush couch and listened to the techno music blast in the background.

Amber leaned close toward Connor and whispered in his ear. "Connor...You see that guy over there with the white hat...Go and pick his right pant pocket, he's known to always be carrying big bucks in there."

Connor really didn't want to go and steal but the look Amber was giving him persuaded him to go for it, he really wanted to do just about anything to please her at that point too.

Connor casually walked by the tall man's side and made as he was dancing and accidentally bumped into his target and swiftly picked the man's pocket cryptically.

Connor made his way back to Amber with a smile on his face. "I did it." He showed her the wad of bills he just had stolen.

"You see I told you it was easy, you're going to be a pro before you know it"

Connor sank down onto the very comfortable sofa as Marty approached.

"You guys rolling yet?"

"I'm kinda starting to." Amber replied.

"Cool, come dance with me." Marty pulled Amber to her feet and led her away leaving Connor relaxing back against the couch with his eyes closed listening to the techno music thumping. The effects of the drug were kicking in then and Connor was starting to feel really good in every sense of the word.

Angel parked his car on a curb near the club and then made his way into the club closely followed by Gunn for back up.

Angel scanned through the club in search of his son and just when he spotted him looking like he was asleep on a couch, a big black hairy vampire appeared right then causing people to scream and run. Angel went into attack mode and made the first move and attacked the demon.

"Angelus, what the hell are you doing here!"

Angel didn't even respond he went ahead and kicked then punched the demon.

Marty and Amber ran to where Connor was seated.

"Connor we got to go!" Marty hollered.

Connor stood up and looked over to see what the commotion was all about and was surprised to see Angel in the midst of a battle.

"That's my dad!" Connor happily ran to help his dad.

"What? Connor! What are you doing?" Amber yelled.

"Let's go, we're not safe here." Marty pulled Amber away.

"Dad!"

"Connor?"

"Aw looky here, the miracle child came to help daddy." The demon teased.

"Connor! Get out of here, right now!"

Connor did not opposite and ran to the demon and tried to kick the big demon but the demon easily caught his leg in the air.

If Angel's heart still beat it would have stilled just then.

He filled with anger that the demon had a hold on his son. "Let him go now!"

The demon drew Connor closer as the boy fought with all his might but he was oddly feeling weak and his heart was thumping faster than usual.

Just as Angel was about to charge at the demon, the demon turned to ashes before his eyes dirtying the boy in grey dust. Gunn appeared then he had been the one who killed the demon from behind with a sharp stake.

Angel ran to his son and enveloped him in a huge hug.

"Are you alright?"

Connor giggled. "Yes! I'm better than alright! I'm wonderful! Did you know that I feel connected to you? I never felt that with no one else just only you because you're my dad...My real daddy." Connor hugged his dad close.

"Connor?" Angel was shocked at hearing his son's heartfelt confession.

"Your boy is high off his ass!" Gunn remarked knowingly.

Angel had a sinking feeling that was true as he pulled Connor away just enough to get a look at his face, he noticed his son's eyes fluttering backwards and how his heart beat was racing.

"What did you take?" Angel asked urgently.

"Huh? I didn't take...Oh yeah I took that guy's money because I need it more-"

"What? ... No Connor what drug did you take?"

"I dunno...But I like it...it makes me feel so good!"

"Connor you are not to ever take drugs again! Do you understand me?"

Connor giggled. "Don't be mad Daddy...I feel really good." Connor flashed an angelic smile.

"Let's go." Angel was reasonably angry that his child was drugged out of his mind, he took a firm grip of his son's arm and ushered him out to his car closely followed by Gunn. Angel deposited his offspring in the backseat of his car and Gunn sat down in the passenger seat and then Angel speed out of there.

"Where are we going?"

"Home"

"I don't have a home." Connor sadly expressed while avoiding eye contact with his dad.

"Yes you do with me."

"No-"

"Look, I don't want to hear it Connor you're staying with me and that's final." Angel tried to talk as sternly to his child. He made up his mind that Connor was going to stay and live with him from then on out.

"What about my friends-"

"There are not your friends Connor."

"Yes they are! They helped me-" Connor paused and took a deep gulped, he wasn't feeling too good, he felt nauseous.

"Connor...What's wrong?"

"I don't feel so good."

"I think the kid is going to puke."

"Not in my car!" Angel begged and pulled over and pulled his son out of his car and rubbed soothing circles on Connor's back as the kid barfed on the side of the road.

"I feel better now." Connor's eyes started to flitter more violently and he began to sway on his feet.

Gunn noticed how Connor's eyes fluttered and immediately knew what the kid was on.

"The kid's rolling balls, he's on ecstasy."

"I'm not rolling balls? Am I?" Connor laughed and looked at his hands and held them up to show that he was not in fact rolling any balls.

Angel pulled Connor back into the car and tried to drive to the hotel as fast as he could as Connor sat in the backseat of his dad's car lost in euphoria.

Once Angel pulled up to the Hyperion he pulled his son out of the backseat and swiftly picked up his teenage son up into his arms and carried him into the hotel.

"Is he okay?" Cordelia approached.

"I'm wonderful!" Connor happily exclaimed.

"He's high off his ass." Gunn answered.

"What!" Fred exclaimed.

"This is my entire fault." Angel sadly expressed while looking at his drugged out kid.

"Angel...Don't be so hard on yourself, you have him here now that's all that matters."

"I'm letting you guys know now...He's not leaving again...He's going to live here and follow my rules whether he wants to or not."

"You really want me to stay?" Connor asked surprised.

"Yes son you're staying with me."

"Really?" Connor smiled happily.

"Yes really."

"I love you Daddy! Soo much!"

"His heart is beating pretty rapidly." Angel was really worried.

"You should have him drink water." Gunn advised.

"Yes keep him hydrated Angel." Fred piped up.

Angel was going to take Connor to the kitchen but Cordelia stopped him.

"Hold it, Connor is filthy...eww what is he covered in...Is that vamp dust? It's falling all over the floor and I just cleaned this floor today just take him upstairs and get him cleaned up and I'll bring up some water for him."

"Thanks Cordy."

Angel made his way upstairs with his precious cargo in his arms.

"Dad, why are you carrying me? I can walk you know." Connor laughed as he squirmed a bit in his father's arms.

"Relax." Angel firmly told his son as he entered his bedroom.

Angel laid his son onto his bed and removed his son's shoes.

"You're bed feels really nice...I like it." Connor snuggled against his dad's comforter.

"You can lie here as long as you like."

Cordelia then appeared at the doorway with a glass of water.

"Hey how's he holding up?"

"I don't know Cordy; he's high as a kite."

"Here you go Connor, drink as much as you can" She handed the glass of water to Connor who drank it thirstily and emptied the cup.

"You want more, sweetie?" Cordelia asked.

Connor nodded his head no and handed the cup back to Cordelia.

He suddenly felt nauseous again and he started to gag.

"What is it Connor?"

"I think he needs to throw up Angel."

"Crap! Not on my bed." Angel quickly scooped his son up and took him into the bathroom just in time before Connor tossed out all his cookies.

Angel felt hopeless not able to make his son feel better. He tried rubbing soothing patterns onto the kid's back as the kid regurgitated the final remains that were in his stomach.

Connor felt the drug start to hit him harder once he finished throwing up. His eyes started rolling to the back of his head more frequently and he could not keep a smile off his face, he felt good, really good.

"How are you feeling now pal?"

"Wonderful dad, I feel soo good." Connor relaxed against his dad's broad chest.

Angel did not like how his son's eyes kept rolling back ever so often but knew it was just a side effect of the drug his precious boy had taken.

Angel helped his son stand and step away from the toilet after he flushed away his son's vomit then he wet a small wash cloth and gently wiped at his kid's face.

"Okay son, let's get you back to bed."

Angel guided his kid out of the bathroom and found Cordelia going through one of his drawers.

"Angel, you need to get him changed out of those clothes." She pulled out one of Angel's white undershirts and a pair of flannel pants she had found and handed them to Angel.

"I can do it myself." Connor started to try to unbutton his shirt but it was difficult for him.

"Son let me help you with that." Angel swiftly unbuttoned the shirt and had it off the kid in no time. Angel noticed just how thin his kid really was then and felt a pang of regret in letting him run off that day.

Angel then reached down to undo his kid's jeans then glanced at Cordelia.

"Uh Cordy you think you can turn around? I don't want to embarrass him."

Cordelia smirked then muttered. "Nothing I haven't seen before, I did change many of his diapers only a few months ago."

Angel then proceeded to remove his son's dirty jeans; he also noticed how filthy and tattered the boy's underwear was, so he decided it was best to get the boy cleaned up before dressing him in clean clothing.

"Hey Pal lets go get you cleaned up a bit." Angel took his underwear clad son to the bathroom and ran a bath for his filthy child. Angel un-wrapped a packaged soap and put in on the side of the tub before turning to his son, who was leaning against the wall completely lost in his own world of ecstasy. Just looking at Connor, Angel knew the there was no way the kid would be able to bathe himself correctly. Angel reached toward his child and inch him closer to the tub before he gently yet rapidly yanked off his son's underwear before depositing his son into the warm tub.

"The water feels nice." It was the teen's only remark once he was in the tub.

Angel cleaned up Connor pretty fast even washed the kid's filthy hair all while Connor was lost in his euphoria.

Once Angel was done giving Connor a thorough bath he then helped him into a pair of flannel pants that absolutely swam on him and then soon after he swiftly pulled the white shirt onto him too.

Angel then led Connor to the bed and the teen practically jumped onto the bed and hugged Angel's pillow close taking in his father's scent.

Angel made a mental note to buy some underwear and clothing for his child; he couldn't help but get angry at himself for being such a lousy parent ever since his son came back into this world. He can't change his past mistakes but he is determined not to repeat them again. He already lost his son once before and he's not going to let it happen again. He's going to care, protect and defend his child no matter what.

"I'm going to go and get him some more water." Cordelia worriedly glanced at Connor then picked up the empty glass and left the room.

Connor lied back on his dad's big comfy bed and gazed up towards his dad.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading!<strong>

**If you like it please let me know and I will gladly continue this story...**

**Please Review! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note: Thanks to all those who have left me great reviews! They all made me smile**_** :)**

**I wrote a nice Long chapter just for all of you...****Keep the reviews coming and I'll keep the long chapters coming ****:)**

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><p><strong>Chapter Two<strong>

It pained Angel so to see his son in such a drug induced state. He wished so badly he could simply make his son all better instantly rather than have to wait until the drug ran its course.

"Daddy… Why do you look so sad? Do I make you sad?"

"I'm not sad… I love you too much that you could never make me sad." Angel smiled down at his child.

"I love you too daddy." Connor jumped up and engulfed his dad in a tight hug.

It felt good for Angel to have his son being so affectionate with him. He just couldn't make up his mind if it was just the drug talking or if Connor truly felt that way about him.

Cordilia then entered Angel's bedroom with a large cup of cool water along with a pitcher of water. She found Angel being hugged by his son; she couldn't help but smile at the sweet moment.

Angel pulled away from his son gently and turned toward Cordelia.

Cordelia walked closer and offered the glass of water to the teen and set the pitcher on the nightstand.

"Here you go sweetie." Connor accepted the glass and drank it thirstily as Angel and Cordelia watched warily.

Connor leaned back onto the bed closing his eyes and Angel leaned in and took away the now empty glass from the boy's gentle grasp and placed the glass on the side nightstand.

"Hey pal, I don't think you should go to sleep just yet."

"I'm na sleeping... It just feels soo good dad and your bed is the most comfortable bed I have ever been in...Come... sit next to me dad." Connor murmured and patted the side next to him as he opened his eyes looked up at his dad expectantly.

Angel sat next to his son and Connor snuggled against his dad's strong chest. Cordelia smiled at Angel expressing how cute she thought the sight was.

"Thanks Cordy for all your help, I really appreciate it."

"You don't have to thank me; I have a special place in my heart for Connor too, call me if you need anything I'll be downstairs helping Fred do some research on our latest case."

Cordelia left Angel's bedroom and Angel look down at his son and noticed how his had a smile plastered on his face.

"I've never felt this happy in my entire life."

"You will feel this happy again son, just without what you took tonight, I'll make sure of it."

"You know... I never really liked Fa- uh Holtz, he always made me feel like I was a monster... just like my parents."

Angel could not contain the anger he felt at that pronouncement.

"Did he ever hurt you son?" The worry was evident in Angel's voice.

"He did when I was small but only when I was bad but once I got older I got too fast for him to catch." Connor ended up laughing at the memory while Angel looked disturbed.

"You know I've never really felt safe before…but now being with you makes me feel really safe."

"I will always protect you Connor and keep you just as safe from here on out I promise you son."

Connor started squirming uncomfortably against Angel's gentle hold and started to make his way off the bed.

"Hey, where do you think you're going?" Angel asked with a stern undertone already fearing that Connor wanted to bolt out of the room.

"Uh… the bathroom?" Connor looked at his dad questionably.

"Oh... okay...go ahead but leave the door open please."

Connor went and did business and was back by Angel's side in no time.

"You want some more water?"

"No…dad, tell me about my mother."

Angel was a bit taken aback by his son's request but complied none the less.

"Well… your mother, Darla was a beautiful woman with an angelic face and bright blue eyes, you were the best thing that had ever happened to her, you shared your soul with her and that brought out a beautiful side to her that I had never seen before. She loved you so much Connor, so much so that she gave her life for you."

"Really? Holtz always told me that she was a vicious monster that she even tried to kill me when I was born...I'm glad she didn't...it always hurt thinking my own mother wanted to kill me…I guess allot of what Holtz told me was lies…you know he died right?" Connor asked quietly against Angel's shirt as his eyes continued to flutter wildly.

"Who died?" Angel was taken aback by the question deep down he hoped the kid meant Holtz.

"Holtz... he... killed himself last week...he made Justine kill him so it looked like a vampire attack so I would think you killed him, he's was not who I thought he was...I don't know what to believe anymore... everything I was taught to believe most of it has been lies." Connor's eyes watered up and spilled a couple of tears down his cheeks.

Angel saw his son's dilated eyes spilling a few tears and he pulled his son close and fiercely hugged him tightly.

"I'm so sorry Connor; I wish I could have saved you from the hell you went through… I promise you son, I will never fail you again."

"I don't blame you." Connor murmured against his dad's chest as his body trembled from coldness and it didn't go unnoticed by Angel, he wished so badly he could warm his son up with body heat.

"Come on kiddo lets get you under the covers you'll be warmer." Angel rose up out of the bed and pulled back the comforter from his bed and pulled it over his child then he filled a glass of water from the pitcher that was still half way full on the nightstand and held it out to his son.

"Here you go son, drink some more water."

"I don't want-"

"Just try drinking some...please."

At hearing Angel's pleading tone Connor reach forward accept the glass and drink the water.

"Good boy." Angel praised.

Connor had never really been praised before and it made him feel nice hearing it, he handed back a now empty glass to Angel with a shy smile painted on his face.

Angel placed the glass on the nightstand and went and sat down next to his son.

Connor instantly snuggled close to his dad one again and Angel took in his son's scent not wanting to ever let his baby boy go again.

Angel felt his son falling into sleep and lightly shook him.

"Hey pal look at me for a second." Angel wanted to make sure his kid's eyes were not fluttering any longer from his high.

Brilliant blue eyes looked up at Angel and he then felt relieved that Connor's eyes were no longer fluttering but just drooping from exhaustion.

Angel gently grasped each side of his son's milky white cheeks and looked at his kid straight in the eyes lovingly.

"Do me favor kiddo…remember how much I love you once you wake up." Angel pulled Connor closer and gave him a kiss on his forehead.

Connor nodded sleepily then snuggled closer to his dad and fell into a peaceful deep sleep.

Angel was preparing mentally for when his son were to wake, he knew that the kid would most likely be hostile with him, so he cherished every second he held his son close.

Angel silently held his child for a few hours before all too soon for the vampire Connor started to moan awake.

Connor's head was dully throbbing as he woke, he surprisingly felt quite comfortable were he lay, he slowly opened his eyes and he was met with worried brown ones starring back at him. Connor's eyes instantly widened as his body grew stiff; he thought he had just dreamed the previous night.

Connor visibly flushed and pulled away from Angel, looking for a quick exit.

"Its okay, you're safe." Angel reassured, talking to his son like he was a skittish puppy.

"What happened?" Connor demanded looking everywhere except at Angel.

"I found you in a club that you had no business being in drugged out of your mind, what the hell were you thinking young-man?" Angel's worry and anger at finding his son drugged came out vehemently.

"I don't have to answer to you demon!"

Angel tried to cover up the hurt he felt with a stern gaze towards his son.

"How are you feeling now?"

Connor ignored Angel's question entirely and asked one of his own.

"Where are my clothes?"

Angel gestured toward a plush chair where Connor's clothing lay.

"I am going to buy you some new clothes later on tonight, those are past their limit."

"I don't need or want anything from you." Connor walked to the chair and changed into his jeans not caring with underwear then slipped on his shoes. He decided to stay with the white t-shirt he was already wearing since he really liked how it felt and smelled…it had his dad's scent which sort of comforted him in a way he had never felt before and that wasn't something he was ready to admit willingly. Also Connor wasn't too fond of the red dress shirt Marty had loaned him, he seriously thought Marty was some kind of witch or something that was the only reason his mind could come up with for the way he felt and acted the prior night.

"Are you hungry?" Angel asked trying his best to ignore his son's insolent attitude.

"No...I'm leaving." Connor was having a hard time making eye contact with Angel, he felt quite embarrassed with most of the prior nights events.

"No, you're not."

Connor glanced up at his dad in utter outrage.

"You can't make me stay here!"

"I'm your dad and you will do as I say and I say you are staying until I decide you are ready to be on your own so until then you will live here."

"No!" Connor tried to run past Angel but was easily caught by his dad's arms. Connor noticed he was not as fast or as strong as usual as he tried to tear out of his father's strong grip.

"You need to calm down son." Angel told his son firmly against his ear as he held him close and securely.

"Let me go!"

After a few minutes of putting up a fight to get out from his dad's hold he tired himself out and soon laid lack against his dad's chest breathing heavily.

Angel walked Connor towards a plush chair and pushed him to sit in it.

"Stay put." Angel commanded sharply before he went and filled a glass with water at the nightstand.

All Connor could do was glare at his dad as he tried to catch his breath again.

Angel walked back over to his son and held out the glass with water towards him. "Drink it."

Connor accepted the glass with a nasty glare etched on his face and drank up all the water thirstily.

Once Connor was done drinking, Angel took the glass away from him and looked down sadly at his son.

"Look Connor, you're my kid and I love you, there's nothing you can do or say to change that, I will do everything to help keep you safe…you taking drugs last night was wrong, you could have easily died! You must never do drugs again, do you understand me?"

"I don't have to answer to you!"

"Yes, you do."

"No I don't! I don't answer to demons!"

"Do you remember what I told you before you went to sleep last night?" Angel tenderly asked, trying to find that sweet boy he knew existed inside Connor.

Connor visibly flushed at the memory knowing how he had been very affectionate with Angel the night before.

"I'm not just a demon, I am your dad that loves you very much."

"I need to go."

"I already told you, you're not leaving, the only place you are going to go now is downstairs with me so you can eat then we could talk."

Angel did not wait to hear whatever protest his son was bound to spew; he simply grabbed the kid by the arm and led him downstairs to the kitchen all while Connor loudly protested at being manhandled.

Cordelia, Fred and Gunn were all gathered around the front desk and they looked on a little shocked that Angel was taking a more hand on approach in dealing with his kid. Gunn was a little more satisfied that Angel was finally taking the boy in hand.

Once Angel entered the kitchen he sat Connor on a stool and looked at his kid poignantly.

"Stay put."

Angel was surprised when his kid did not even move an inch; he thought the kid must have been pretty hungry.

Angel went to the refrigerator and pulled out some ham, cheese, lettuce and tomatoes. He then grabbed a loaf of bread of the side counter and started the task of putting together a sandwich for the kid. He was pretty quick about it; he had the sandwich served on a plate before the kid in no time along with a tall glass of milk on the side.

Connor was starving so he readily picked up the sandwich and took a bite then he made a face and spit out a piece of a tomato.

"What is that?" He asked clearly disgusted.

"It's a slice of tomato."

"I don't like it."

"Okay…pick it out then."

Connor gave a small huff and picked out the tomatoes then ate the sandwich hungrily and drank his milk.

Angel sat next to Connor and waited until his son finished his meal to have a very serious talk with him.

Once Connor was done eating he glanced at his side to Angel. "Thank you for the food, but I still think it would be best for me to go."

"I already told you no, you're not leaving."

That did not bode well with Connor at all. "You can't make me stay!"

"Lower your voice and calm down, I am not yelling at you so I'd appreciate the same courtesy and as I said before yes you are. I am going to make sure that you are safe from now; we are going to go over a few rules that I am going to set for you to keep you safe and the consequences if you ever break one of the rules too."

"I'm not going to listen to you!" Connor stood abruptly flinging the stool he was sitting in backwards then tried to make a run for it.

Angel quickly stood up and took a firm hold of the kid's arm before he made it out the kitchen door and gave him light shake. "What do you think you are doing?"

Deep down Connor did want to listen to Angel, deep down he knew how much his dad really loved and cared about him but he was such a stubborn boy that was not willing to give in.

"Let go of me!" Connor tried to pull out of Angel's firm grip wildly.

Angel instead pulled his son in closer and wrapped his arms around the teen securely; afraid the boy would bolt.

"Just relax, you are safe here, this is your home and you don't run away from your home, you need to listen to me because I'm your dad and you're my kid."

Connor knew Angel was not going to let go of him if he kept on fighting back so he simply quit fighting against Angel's strong hold but he was not going to quit for long… When he had the chance he was going to make a run for it, so until then he would act as if he was acceptant of Angel's authority.

Angel felt his son suddenly relax in his arms.

"Fine I'll… listen to you." Connor muttered and acted defeated.

Angel smiled and released his kid and looked at him both relived and happy that the kid was finally showing signs of obedience.

"Are you going to try and run off again?"

"I won't."

"Good, now I think now we should go over those rules I was talking about." Angel went to one of the kitchen drawers and pulled out a note pad and a pen and placed the items on the counter in front of where Connor was seated earlier. " Pick up the stool and have a seat son."

Connor replaced the stool back in place and sat himself down looking at the items his dad placed on the counter in front of him suspiciously.

Angel went and sat next to his son once again. "Here's how this is going to work, I am going to tell you a rule and then you will write it down on the notepad before you."

Connor was about to argue but he decided to keep his mouth shut and play along, he couldn't wait till he had the chance to get away. Connor picked up the pen and looked at his dad expectantly and Angel smiled at him.

"Rule number one... No drugs and no alcohol… Rule number two…no lying what so ever...Rule number three…no hunting on your own…Rule number four…no stealing…Rule number five… no disobedience... and Rule number six no running off... I think that will be all for now…do you have any questions about the rules I've set for you?"

"No." Connor replied in a tone filled with boredom as he tried his best to hide his annoyance.

"Okay…also there will be consequences if you break any of the rules…so I suggest you follow the rules or else you will find yourself… grounded."

"Grounded?"

"Yes grounded, meaning you would be put on restriction and not allowed to do anything remotely fun until I say otherwise."

Connor bite back an angry retort, he thought Angel was being overly controlling.

"So now that we got that settled lets go check out what the gang is up to." Angel threw an arm around Connor's shoulders and led the teen out to the lobby.

Connor felt a little awkward as his dad's friends stared at him.

"Hey Connor, I'm happy to see you're feeling better." Cordelia smiled and walked over to the boy and gave him a hug.

"I'm happy you're feeling better too Connor, we were all pretty worried." Fred said and went and gave the boy a hug too after Cordelia finally released him.

"You gave us quiet a scare last night kid, I'm glad to see you're alright." Gunn said and ruffled the boy's hair a bit.

Connor shyly smiled, it made him feel pretty good that they all were being so nice to him; it made him feel even more as if he belonged there, but he tried his best to brush those feelings to the side. He was beyond confused on what he wanted anymore, he was raised to hate all demons and yet he wouldn't even exist if it weren't for two vampires. Connor wanted to deal with his conflicting feelings on his own and far away from everything that just confused even more and also because he was scared and that was something he rarely ever felt and the very few times he had felt that in the past the only thing he knew to do was to run.

"Hey Angel, Fred and I are going to go to the mall in a few minutes and I think it would be a great idea to take Connor with us, it'll give him a chance to pick out things he likes and it'll be fun for him too."

Angel sighed and looked at his son. "I don't know Cordy, I don't think it's such a good idea-"

Connor on the other hand thought it was a great idea…he had no idea really what a mall was but he didn't care he wanted to get out. "Dad, I want to go with them."

Angel could not say no to his kid when his kid's bright blue eyes looked at him pleadingly.

"Fine…you can go But you need to stay close to Cordy and Fred at all times, understand?"

"Yes, I'll stay close to them."

"Great then lets start heading out, don't worry Angel we'll take good care of him." Cordelia promised as she grabbed her purse then walked over to Angel.

Angel withdrew his wallet and handed Cordelia one of his credit cards. "Don't go too crazy buying stuff, only get stuff he really needs please."

"Of course Angel, you know me, I never go crazy buying stuff." Cordelia smiled a little wickedly.

"Come on sweetie, let's get you some style." Cordelia told the boy waving him to follow her and Fred.

Angel was not ready to let his son go, so he pulled the boy towards him.

"Remember to stay close to them and listen to them, have fun and behave yourself okay, I'll see you later kiddo." Angel pulled Connor into a hug and then kissed him on his temple gently.

Connor was not used to being babied in any way and it sort of made him feel safe on one hand but on the other it sort of annoyed him too. He couldn't help but feel kind of embarrassed with his dad's public display of affection as he pulled away from his dad and follow the women out.

As they drove toward the mall, Cordelia tried to engage in a conversation with the really quiet boy in the backseat of her car.

"Conner, you are going to love the mall!"

"What's the mall?"

"You'll see now, we are almost there."

Cordelia parked her car and the trio made their way into the large mall. Connor looked around in amazement; he had never seen that many people gathered together at one place walking around carrying shopping bags.

"Connor, stay close to us." Cordelia looked behind her and noticed Connor was slowly trailing behind her looking around as they walked through the mall.

"I'm right behind you."

"Get next to me." Cordelia pointed to the space by her side.

Connor sighed and then walked to stand next to her; he was surprised when she took a hold of his hand and then started walking in a quicker pace.

"You don't have to hold my hand." Connor complained as he tried to shake of her grasp.

"Your dad would kill us if we lost you so I am not taking any chances buddy."

Cordelia led him and Fred into a clothing store and started scanning through some jeans and pulled out a few that she thought would fit the boy nicely while Fred was scanning through a few shirts.

"Connor what do you think about these?" Fred held out a few polo shirts toward the boy.

Connor shrugged.

"I really like those." Cordelia remarked.

"I don't understand why I need more than one set of clothing, in Quor-Toth I managed without many clothes."

"Well in this world things are different; you're going try this on for me." Cordelia held out a pair of jeans to the boy.

Connor accepted the jeans then reached down to undo his pants.

"Stop! What are you doing?" Cordelia hissed irritated that the boy was about to undress in public.

"You asked me to try it on."

"Yes in the dressing room not out here! Come on, I'll show you where you can change." Cordelia led the teen to the dressing room and waited outside the door to see for herself if the pants fit the boy well.

"Come out and show me how it looks once you try them on."

Moments later Connor stepped out of the dressing room.

"They look really nice Connor, how do they feel? Are they comfortable?"

"Yeah...they fit well, I like them."

"Great, let's go find you a few more pairs in that size."

Cordelia and Fred helped Connor find a few more pairs of jeans and a few t-shirts and polo shirts, socks and underwear in the clothing store. By the time they were done in that particular clothing store they had three bags full of clothing for the boy.

"Okay, we've got the clothing out of the way now lets get some stuff for your room, every teenage boy wants to make their room their own in their own way...what's your favorite color Connor?" Fred asked as they entered a home decor store.

"Uh...I don't know…don't have one I guess."

"Everybody has a favorite color...come here, look at these different colored comforters, which one do you like the best?"

Connor looked at all the different colored comforter sets and a green colored one he found he liked the best.

"I like the green one."

"Good, then green must be your favorite color."

They ended up buying a bed in a bag green comforter set that the kid had chosen and a few accessories for his bedroom too.

Connor could not believe how long he had been at the mall with Cordelia and Fred, he thought about running off a few times but every time he thought he had a chance Cordelia Chase decided to grab his hand in a death grip. He hated to admit it to himself but he was kind of enjoying himself spending time with them, he found the mall to be quite fascinating. Connor started to realize the more time he spent with the women he didn't have the heart to run from them he didn't know when it happened but he actually cared about the women and what they thought of him.

"Oh I almost forgot we need to get Connor some shoes too and then I think that would be it." Cordelia told Fred.

They made a last stop at a shoe store and Cordelia had the boy try on a few pairs of sneakers, she ended up buying three pairs for the boy and then they were done with their shopping extravaganza.

They made it back to the car with Connor carrying big three bags and Cordelia and Fred each carrying two big bags.

Connor could not believe how much meaningless things people obsessed themselves with in this world. He was also tired, he had spent hours in the mall with the women and all he wanted to do now was sleep and sleep he did, he ended up knocking out in the backseat of Cordelia's car about halfway back home.

Cordelia was the first to notice the teen fast asleep in the backseat when they came across a stop light; she lightly got Fred's attention. "Look in the backseat, how cute is that?"

They had spent the whole day out and the sun was starting to set just then as they arrived before Connor woke up.

"Sweetie, wake up your back home." Cordelia said as she parked her car.

Connor awoke a little startled in the backseat.

"Let's go show your dad all the stuff we got."

Connor felt like it was now or never, he had a pretty good time with Coredlia and Fred but he still was not sure if living with Angel was the best thing for him. He was not sure of so many things, the man who had raised was not the man he thought he was and he was scared maybe Angel might cause him just the same or even more pain. Also since he felt such a strong connection to his birth father and a love that he had never known before it only put a fear in him that only made him want to do one thing and that thing was run.

"Okay." Connor made as if he was going to follow when he saw Cordelia and Fred collect some bags and start making their way to the hotel, he made as if he too was going collect some bags, once he saw their attention was elsewhere, he made a rash decision in a state of panic and made a run for it as fast as he could.

Cordelia and Fred entered the hotel with handful of bags.

Angel and Gunn spotted them and rushed to help them.

Angel noticed his son was not near. "Where's Connor?"

"He's right behind us." Cordelia looked behind her and noticed the kid was not there she then went and looked outside and then stood open mouthed in shock.

Since it was already dark out Angel went outside too and looked around. "He must have not have gotten far, I'll be back once I find him." Angel sprinted off after his offspring following the kid's scent that was still strong enough to track.

Connor did not know where to run to, he felt so lost and he hated to admit it to himself kind of scared too but he simply just wanted to be by himself, he trusted no one at that moment just himself really. He ended up running back to the only place he spent most of his time in the past week, it was to an abandoned dirty flea infested nasty motel, he went into the room he had met Sunny in and thought if he should call this place his new home. He looked under a dirty mattress and found his stake he had left there before and shoved it in his pocket; he planned on releasing some tension in hunting some vampires that night.

"Connor lets go home."

Connor didn't need to turn around to know that his dad was standing right behind him.

"No…this is my home."

"No it's not, your home is with me, now lets go now." Angel made to grab the boy but Connor had been expecting the move and easily moved out of the way and faced his dad.

"I just want to be alone!"

"You can be alone all you want at home in your room since you will now be grounded for running off, now lets go." This time Angel was able to grab the kid firmly and march him out of the filthy motel.

With Angel's quick pace they arrived back at the Hyperion in no time.

"Oh good you found him." Cordelia said in relief once she saw Angel dragging a very reluctant teen in through the doors.

"You can't do this! Let me go!"

"Go wait for me in my office now." Angel commanded firmly as he lightly shoved his son towards his office.

"No!" Connor tried to get past his dad to run out but he was forcefully stopped and turned facing Angel's office again and this time Angel gave his bottom a mighty swat as he told him sternly. "Go wait in my office right now."

That one swat had hurt Connor more than let on, he was about to argue but once he saw Angel raise his hand again to deliver another sound swat at his backside he wisely made his way into his dad's office and couldn't help slamming the office door loudly in both anger and frustration.

"Yo Angel, word of advise, that kid is going to need more than one swat to tame that attitude." Gunn approached Angel's side.

"I can't believe you actually spanked Connor." Cordelia was slightly amused and shocked.

"Well I can't let him get away with acting like a brat."

"Yeah man I agree with you, that kid needs to know whose boss; he needs to be put in his place a.s.a.p."

"Angel you're not really going to spank Connor tonight are you?" Fred asked worried for the boy.

"No I don't plan on it, I'm just going to talk to him and hopefully get through to him but if he keeps pushing me tonight I just might."

"If he keeps asking for it, don't hesitate in giving that boy what he needs."

"And what will that be Gunn?" Cordelia asked already knowing what the man's answer was.

"A good spanking."

"Charles, this is Connor we are talking about, don't say that." Fred tried to defend the boy.

"Its true babe, that kid needs to know his place."

"Hey guys, can you do me a favor and head out for awhile, go on and have some dinner on me and please bring some dinner back for Connor."

"Alright we'll get out of your hair now, just please don't be too hard on him." Cordelia accepted the money Angel gave her for dinner and then they were soon out the door leaving Angel alone in the lobby gathering his thoughts.

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><p><em><strong>TBC<strong>_

**Thanks for reading! :)**

**Please Review!**


	3. Chapter 3

_Aurthor's Note: Thanks to all those who left me great reviews! _:)

_Warning:Please remember Connor is not your ordinary human, he has a high tolareance for pain. This chapter will contain a very long detailed spanking of a teenager..so don't like ..don't read..Thanks!_

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><p><em><strong>Chapter Three<strong>_

Angel walked into his office and was not surprised to find Connor as hostile as ever.

"Why can't you just leave me alone?"

"Connor you're my son, I simply can't do that."

Connor felt panic rip through him but he managed to force himself to stand still. He pushed his fisted hands in his pant's pocket to hide the shaking as the vampire reached for him, waiting for it to happen. Connor felt the rough wood of his forgotten sharp stake. Time, space, thought went all weird. It was as if someone snapped a flashbulb in his eyes…something exploded inside his brain, when Connor could see again, he was holding the stake out and Angel was frozen in place just inches away. There was a blank hole in Connor's memory…he had no recollection of pulling out the stake…just feeling it in his pocket. Connor was terrified; he was holding a stake out on his dad.

Angel stood perfectly still, not believing what just happened. When he advanced on Connor, the kid just stood there for a second, flinching like he was expecting to be hit. Just as Angel reached for him, Connor's hand came up out of his pocket with the stake. It spun in Connor's hand with amazing speed. Connor waved it in warning and Angel froze in his tracks, eyes glued to the stake. Angel stood calm and not moving, Connor was totally out of control here, his face twisted in rage but his blue eyes reflected only wild desperation. Connor's voice trembled and his hand was none to steady.

You…you are go…going to let me out of here…I mean it. Just let me out."

Taking a long look at the boy holding the stake just inches from his chest, Angel's eyes narrowed. Connor was afraid. Afraid of whom, Angel or himself was unclear. If Connor were smart it would be Angel he feared.

Slowly, deliberately, Angel stood straight and crossed his arms it was a deceivingly calm posture. He was ready to move and could still protect himself if he needed to. He spoke with a firm, level voice.

"That's not going to happen. What is going to happen is that you are going to hand me the stake."

Angel sounded so positive it rattled Connor. He shook his head, uncertain what to do now. Connor slowly backed away from and around Angel, inching his way to the office door, Angel shadowed him.

"No…stop! You're gonna let me go!" Connor's voice gave his fear away.

Angel risked a step forward. "Where you going to run to? Back to the streets? The only reason this isn't working out for you is because you won't let it."

Connnor scowled and tired to make his voice sound more authoritative and jabbed the stake at Angel. "Now… now... let me go."

Angel just dropped his hands down from his chest and shook his head almost sadly as he took another step forward. His eyes soft but his voice was firm as steel, the contradiction sent shivers of warning down Connor's spine.

"Nope. Not going to happen son."

Connor frowned in frustration. He had the weapon, the upper hand and that should mean he called the shots, he should be in control. Angel took another step forward. This time Connor flinched and took a step backward.

Angel watched as Connor's confidence began to crumble. "Is it really that bad here, Connor? Hot showers whenever you need or want. All the food you can eat…not having to worry where you're going to sleep that night, being able to live and not just survive. You got to admit that bed has to be the best one in years kiddo, beats the flea-infested nest I found you in. You have people here you can trust and actually care about you."

Sweat began to bead on Connor's lip and forehead. Connor's eyes lost their wild look and his anger deteriorated. His hand shook as it pointed the stake at the vampire. Angel took another step forward adding pressure.

"C'mon Connor, you don't want to do this."

Angel saw the stake dip down a little, that was all he needed. He could easily take it now but he wanted Connor to make the decision and he was so close.

"Connor, you're going to have to stake me to get out of here…so either get on with it or hand it to me."

Connnor blinked and swallowed hard. _Stake Angel…could he do that?_ "I…I will… I know how….I'll use it, Angel."

A dark look that caused gooseflesh to rise on Connor's arms crossed Angel's face.

"You're welcome to try pal," Angel said with unpleasant confidence as he took another step closer…he was right up against the point of the stake in Connor's hand. Angel raised his hand out for the stake, his eyes never leaving Connor's.

"What's it going to be son?" Connor's eyes shifted from the stake back to Angel. There was no longer any anger in those blue orbs. Any threat to Angel was gone. Connor was now fighting himself. Angel spoke a firm demand.

"Connor, give me the stake."

The deep voice was low but the tone was all business. Little tremors ran down Connor's spine and his heart thudded so hard it hurt. A warm heat filled Connor's body and numbed his brain…he felt himself begin to zone out.

"Did you hear me?"

Angel watched Connor's eyes lower to the stake he was holding. Connor looked at it like he had never seen it before. It was all over, Connor knew it too, and he just needed to stop fighting it. It took a couple seconds for Angel to force his tone to stay firm when his heart was softening against the utterly lost expression on his son's young face. Blue eyes seemed to almost glaze over as Connor stared at the stake.

"Don't make me take if from you."

Tortured eyes flickered up to meet his, Angel battled to keep up the authoritarian posture and tone as those dark pools of pain nearly drowned out any sternness he had left. What was this kid doing to himself? One more warning and he would just have to take it away from Connor. He was surprised that he was able to scrape enough displeasure to speak harshly, that his frustration and growing inpatience reflected sharply in his tone.

"Connor…give…me…the…stake…Now!"

The threat registered Connor's numb brain. His hand was shaking badly. He's actually shaking all over. He could hardly believe what had just happened, Connor was so confused to the point of feeling ill. Trembling fingers touched Angel's outstretched palm, Connor let go of the stake and a great deal of control.

Closing his slender arms tightly around himself, Connor backed away up against the study's wood paneled wall and slid to sit on his heels. About to be completely overwhelmed by emotions he buried his face in his hands and battled to get it together. Angel watched him literally fight himself and suffer for it. Connor was so desolate and lost that Angel really didn't want to have to get after him but to hold him and make it all right. He knew there was no way he could overlook this…not a weapon. Connor had really crossed a dangerous line. Angel could not let this go, no matter how much he wished otherwise.

"Oh no…we aren't done yet."

The only way to make it right was to let Connor know there were consequences for his actions…hard ones at times. He firmly grasped Connor under the arms and pulled him to his feet into a brief but no less tender hug. There was no response at all. Angel then tugged Connor along over to the over stuffed couch. In one movement he was seated with Connor face down, bottom up across his lap. Connor so far had not put up any struggle at all. Comfortable with that, Angel raised his hand and started spanking hard and fast using some of his vampire strenghth.

**_SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!_**

**_SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!_**

"That was not a smart move!"

Connor kept quite, he was not going to show any weakness, he was strong, he was the destroyer.

Angel then removed his belt and with no warning Angel slapped his belt sharply against the boys denim covered bottom, making Connor jump.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

Connor was determined to just take it, to get it over with. The belt fell a few more times and the only other response was the fisting of his hands together and a couple stifled grunts, Connor was utterly stoic. Angel slightly increased the strength and speed of the swats. Connor rolled his hips and jumped at the impact. It hurt…it hurt a lot.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

Angel could hear Connor's ragged breathing but that was all. Angel knew he was in for a real battle. Connor was maintaining a facade. What Angel didn't know was that Connor was fighting internally so hard that in his resistance. He was concentrating on that pain more as well as maintaing his inner stronghold. The first couple slaps stung but not to bad. It was those that followed that began to get to Connor and there was no finding a place to hide or block out the heat.

Angel brought the belt down a few more times against Connor's seat.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

He was angry with himself for being such a wimp, the sting had built up to a heat he could not ignore, and it was more than Connor could blow off or shut out. He gulped in great gasps of air, and tried to get up.

"Ow!…okay …okay, Angel, enough! We're done." Connor said angrily…as if they had been playing some game and he no longer wished to pay. Angel continued to lay on the belt.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

"It's dad or daddy to you and Nope…not yet."

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

"Arrrrrrrhaahh!…Stopit!…Ang.. Daad!…don't!…Oww…stop!" Connor shouted in anger. Connor began to really put up a fight. He squirmed and wiggled on the large lap but Angel held him firmly in place. The floor blurred as the sting of the belt made his eyes tear up.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

"Noooo!… Stopitstopitstopit!…daaaaaad…don't!…arrgah…enough…ah!…stop!"

Angel did stop and ran his hand over Connor's bottom. Amazing heat radiated up through the jean, clad bottom. Connor shivered a little; instinct told him this was going to be different. There was a silent but serious tension from the vampire.

"Stop? Connor, I haven't even begun." Angel began to smack Connor's bottom again harder this time. Connor reared up on his arms and tried to get on his feet.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

"Ow!…stopit!…I said stop…ahhh…quit it…ouch!"

Angel held him firmly down. Connor was beginning to panic and lose his temper.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

"Owwww…hmmpha…ahhgrha… Daad stop!"

Angel didn't stop he kept on belting Connor's upturned bottom. "You will never turn a weapon on those who care about you, or those you care about!"

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

He was helpless to break free from Angel's hold. "Care? I don't care about anyone!"

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

"Uh huh…riiiight. We both know you weren't really going to use that stake. You had several chances to stab me and you didn't. Now why do you suppose that is?"

"I HATE YOU!"

He just wasn't getting through to the boy…yet.

Connor yelped and bucked as the belt snapped three more times each harder than the last.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP!**

Tears of anger burned his eyes, yet he was able to maintain composure to some degree.

"Did you really want to kill me, Connor?"

Words spoken so soft and tender it was terrible how they lanced through Connor's chest like a knife. The answer was on his lips…he mashed them together and locked his jaw.

All the answer Angel got was angry silence. Roughly he readjusted Connor on his lap. He asked him again more firmly and gave him a particularly sharp swat.

**SNAP!**

"Answer me, Connor."

Getting jostled abruptly like that shook Connor up. For a spit second, the truth was startled out of him and slipped past the gates of anger. He shook his head no; he really didn't want to kill his dad. That earned him another smarting slap on the butt.

"I couldn't hear that, Connor. Did you want to kill me?"

"No!"

Connor's defensive ice wall sustained a huge crack with that small admission. Angel didn't give him a chance to take it back or say anything to cover that truth.

"You panicked and made a really BIG mistake, one you will NEVER repeat EVER. **SNAP SNAP SNAP!…**you will never turn a weapon on those who care about you, or those you care about!…**SNAP SNAP SNAP!** You will never turn a weapon on those who care about you, or those you care about!…**SNAP SNAP SNAP!"**

Angel and the belt repeated that like a litany.

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

"Ahhh!…Okayokayokay!…nugh ….stop… that hurts!…stooooop!"

"Now repeat that for me?"

NoooWWWWWAH!"

**SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! **

There was no way that Connor was about to do that. That would mean he was admitting defeat, speaking it out loud would be an altogether more dangerous admission. …That he did care. Connor, still far from giving in, just continued to struggle, earning more leather kisses.

"Arrrgha!…that..Oww hurts…Owww! Lemego!"

Unwilling to strike Connor any harder, Angel just didn't have the heart to deliver what he knew he would have received as a boy or what Connor deserved.

"It's meant to hurt…and it's about to hurt a lot more."

Angel was not about to stop just yet. Angel gripped Connor tightly and reached underneath Connor's belly and began to unzip Connor's jeans. Connor fought Angel in panic, small noises of desperation, like a cross between words, whimpers, grunts and growls escaped Connor in his struggle to keep his jeans on. Connor's thrashing around only aided Angel. He was skinned of the jeans in a frightening short time and placed back over the vampire's lap.

Angel gazed down at his kid's already bright pink bottom. "Last chance. Let's hear it."

The boy was not yet willing to retreat from the battlefield. Angel raised the belt and stalled his arm. Angel just couldn't add more marks to Connor's young flesh. Angel set the belt down, raised his hand to continue, probably in vein. "Connor…what's the rule?"

"I hate you!"

Looking down on the stubborn, angry, boy as he struggled wildly over his lap, with no further thought, Angel brought his hand down hard on Connor's rear. He got major reaction from the boy this time. Connor's spine when rigid and his legs kicked out straight, lifting Angel's with them.

**SWAT!**

"Ooowwwwahhhh!"

Connor had no jeans to buffer his butt this time. He bellowed in outrage as Angel's hard hand collided against his left cheek…pain took root and blossomed. Seconds later the right cheek felt another smack.

**SWAT...SWAT**

"NOOOO! Daad don't!"

Angel ignored his cries. His firm voice only repeated over and over the demand for Connor to repeat the rule. His hand smacked his ass with a stinging force. From top to bottom and a few blows aimed at the junction of buttocks and thighs driving home the lesson by punctuating each word with a powerful swat. Connor's right hand shot back to cover his butt. Angel just grabbed his right arm and pinned it in the small of his back. Connor bucked and fought liked crazy.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"AHH!NOOOO!…Daaad stahhhpha…ahhh stop!. Okayokayokayokay…please…owww…that hurts!"

**SWAT! SWAT!**

A couple vicious swats to his tender thighs really got him kicking. Long muscular legs stilled Connor's kicking ones, never missed a beat.

"Now one last time before I really start spanking hard…say it, Connor."

Connor was not going to win, it hurt too badly. There was no eluding this…this punishment. No withdrawal to secret mental corners. The sting of the bush drug him back to the here and now each time he drifted. He had little choice at this point. He choked out the words, hating himself with each one.

**SWAT! **"Ooww…I will…**SWAT! **ouch!…**SWAT! **choke…**SWAT! **no!…**SWAT! **nev…**SWAT! **never…turn a …**SWAT! **oww!…**SWAT! **weapon on those**SWAT! **…those**SWAT! **…that **SWAT! **…that…**SWAT! **choke"

Hesitation cost his poor bottom some very painful assistance. "That care about you…**SWAT! ****SWAT! **…it's not so hard to say.**SWAT! **SWAT! ****… now repeat it…**SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! ******Angel's hard hand bit into the boy's ass over and over. Each time harder than the last.

"Thatcareaboutmee!" Connor yelled it out in one long pain filled word. His voice thick with rage. His anger very much intact but it didn't stop or slow Angel's arm, Connor still had yet to finish the verse.

"And? There's more, Connor."

**SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! ************

A few well-aimed shots to the under curve of Connor's wiggling bottom, freed the words. "And those I….I….I care about!(choke)"

Another large crack in that icy fortress. Angel was a battering ram that devastated those walls. Connor was little match for Angel's iron will. It was anger and panic that clogged Connor's throat as the words were strained through clenched teeth.

**SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **************SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! ******

"Stop, Daad…let me up…I said it…. I'm sorry!"

Angel paused. "Do you think I'm sorry is good enough for pulling a stake out on me?"

Connor craned his head around, his voice horse with the anger and tears he fought against but his eyes betrayed him. Angel gave him a few lighter swats to hurry along an answer.

"No…**SWAT!**No! Dad…**SWAT!**oww… would you…**SWAT!**just stop…**SWAT!**I said I'm sorry now just let.. **SWAT! **SWAT!****oww..me up."

Angel stopped. Connor was saying the right words but with the wrong attitude. He spoke slowly to Connor, like he was explaining to a small child. Angel was getting upset himself. Connor was so stubborn.

"You say you're sorry and you might be. But your tone and attitude tell me otherwise. I have a few more points to make, then we'll see about being sorry. Now we have taken care of weapon use…. let's deal with the rest of today's little tantrums."

The hard hand resumed its work. Emotional walls, a lifetime spent building began to feel a real threat to their strength

"No!…listen…Daad!….**SWAT!**SWAT!****Ahh!…**SWAT!**oww!"

Connor's voice rang in outrage off the walls.

"You willfully disobeyed me and ran off…**SWAT.** In fact you lied…**SWAT SWAT SWAT**."

"**SWAT!**SWAT!****Owww Daaad…**SWAT! **SWAT! ******SWAT!**listentomeeeeeeee….**SWAT!**Okay…**SWAT!**SWAT!****Stop!"

Angel's hand stopped again. His firm voice, calm and so soft it sent hot chills down Connor's spine.

"Listen to what, Connor…are you going to tell me you didn't lie? "

Connor couldn't …he shook his head miserably.

"I warned you about running off, just this morning didn't I?

Connor remembered very clearly he nodded yes. This was looking bad.

"Connor you got lucky today…I will never let you get away with chances like that…not with taking risks with your life. So there is nothing to listen to other than my hand smacking your ass."

Angel did just that he began to spank again and hard and fast.

**SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! **************SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! ********SWAT! **SWAT!****************

"No more running, Connor. I told you, that's over with…done. We talk it out. You don't run…you don't lie. I will not put up with that crap any longer. I will not be disrespected, disobeyed and above all I will not be lied to, Connor If you do, you can expect to get spanked. The rules are, for your clarification, respect, and obedience and no, I don't mean blind obedience like some pet. Communication and honesty."

His hand punctuated his statements painfully. **SWAT! **SWAT! ******SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! ******

"Okay…**SWAT! **Okay!**SWAT!** Stop…**SWAT!**daad…**SWAT!**I'm sorry…**SWAT!**stop it!"

Connor jerked and bucked as Angel slapped his butt over and over. He took a couple large, deep, ragged breaths. The hold on his emotions, was tentative at best and the control over them was costing him greatly. Angel could feel it as Connor squirmed over his lap. The trembling chest tight. The muscles rigid as they fought against the storm of emotions battering inside.

"This is just how it is, Connor. So you better get used to it."

**SWAT! **SWAT! ******SWAT! **SWAT! **SWAT! ********SWAT! **************

Connor was close to loosing it all. He could feel it grow. A huge pressure began to build deep in his chest. He couldn't help squirm and kick. His feet were hampered by the jeans down around his ankles. Emotions became blurred and jumbled. Sweat popped out on his forehead and ran down his neck and back. Angel was really spanking hard. It hurt so bad…but not like being beaten. Beatings were unemotional, cold, and brutal. Something he could fight, something he had defenses for. That was a primal sort of pain. It invoked self-preservation.

This was more frightening than any beating. It invoked only the urge to…to…crumble and bawl his head off. This was emotional, personal…intimate. He had no defenses against this. Connor was trapped, unable to fight it. Forced to deal with it and worse of all "feel" it. Angel's hand was searing his butt. He was tightly held, pinned but not painfully or crushed. Anxiety began to grow. Connor needed to do something. A beating would be better…he could take that…not loose his control. It was getting too hard to fight. The knot of pressure was growing painful he would not be able to take much more.

To Angel it was sheer stupidity. For Connor is was his last desperate act of self preservation, a last stand to defend his icy mental fortress. He tried to provoke Angel. Connor thrashed and kicked, he was wild and almost impossible to hold. At first he was shocked by it. Then dismissed it as what appeared to be just one more tantrum but there was something different in Connor's voice. Panic…fear…there was a desperate pitch to it. Angel was getting inside that ice wall and Connor knew it. Connor "wanted" to anger Angel. Instead Angel let Connor's temper blow.

For the first time Angel had real trouble holding onto Connor. He was a wild thing and it was some time before Connor was spent and breathless. Not his anger though…just his stamina. Hateful, cruel, words…most very disgusting. Anger burned hot still…so much pain locked behind gates of icy stubbornness. Connor was all temper and no tears.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"Sorry, Connor, that won't work with me. You can't make be beat you…I won't. Call me what you want to, it won't change that fact . Know this though, little boy, I will spank you…as long and as hard and as often as needed."

Taking a deep breath Angel committed himself to do just that, to break down those icy walls that were suffocating Connor. Emotions…Angel knew from his own experience you can't just bottle them up. Not for long and never without a price. They trembled in Connor's body. Anger and something deeper boiled in there. Angel didn't know if it was the wisest or safest thing to do but it had to be better than letting Connor just keep it held inside.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"Connor, you're going to choke on all that anger and I'm not going to sit by and let my son poison himself with that crap."

Connor was readjusted to where his poor apple red ass was jackknifed higher and began to deliver crisp, rapid swats.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

Panic became a living thing in Connor. The icy defense had taken crippling blows earlier the deep cracks could not hold up under the inferno generated by the brush…it was too much. Somewhere the battle lines changed…from fighting so hard no to cry, to fighting himself to cry. He wanted to cry so badly…Connor wanted to give in and bawl he head off. That need grew like a balloon deep in his chest bigger and bigger. His lungs ached and burned so much he could no longer breathe, as if there were no longer room for his lungs. Control disintegrated under the scorching heat from his dad's hand.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"Da...ad...stop...pleasssssssssseeeeeee...stop...enough...okaaaaaaaay...I can't...pleasenomorepleasenomore stop! stahhhhhhpah more...choke...no...don't...I...I...pleeeeease…ouch...I can't... I can't..."

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"Let it out, kid...it's eating you alive."

It frightened him to death to realize he was so close to letting go...letting it all out. Each time he reached for that hidden place he was yanked back by Angel to face the fact that he was…small... fragile… powerless, worst of all just a scared and hurting kid.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"I...(gasp) ...I need...I need...I (gasp)...I need."

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"Son, what you need is to let that poison go, let it out, Connor, just let it go."

Through his lap Angel could feel the sobs racking Connor's chest. His breathing so shallow almost hyperventilating. There was no sound of tears, just jagged gasps for air. Angel knew Connor was crying. Sobbing in fact. Just in those unnatural silent tears.

Angel felt it before he heard it. Something broke in the boy. Something deep, something huge and painful. First all he heard a small wheezing sound, then it began like a high pitched keen. Still he spanked.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"C'mon, Connor…let it out, baby."

Laying on three very painful smacks.

"Let **SWAT** it **SWAT** out **SWAT**."

A huge sob came crackling out and exploded in the room. It was horrible to hear. Like if Connor had never cried out loud before in his life. It didn't even sound like crying.

Connor went into a panicked frenzy. He struggled wildly and could hear an awful noise. It took him a moment to realize that awful sound was coming from him. He was begging and bawling like a baby.

"No,no,no...choke no, no, no.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

Ouch...ow...it hurts too much...Daaadddyyy please...no more...I'm sorry. gasp please stop, please stop...no, no,no Daadddyy don't…I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm "

But Angel didn't stop he kept right on spanking.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"I am not going to watch you do this any more….not on my watch. I love you too much."

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

"Almost done, Connor. I'm going to make sure you remember this spanking for some time to come…I will not let you do any sort of harm to yourself or anyone else. I love you to damn much, Connor, to let you self -destruct."

Connor heard none of the affection or the endearments, only the burning bite of the vampire's hard hand. With grim determination Angel brought his hand down against the sensitive curve of the buttocks just above the thigh. Six full force blows to each sit spot.

**SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!**

Perhaps for the first time in his young life, Connor screamed…loud a howl followed behind…there was pain…but there was also a weird sense of release.

TBC

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